The room is softly lighted and the bed low and ample. The women are cheerful, and they washed themselves. How the taste for things must wear down with so much automatism. We watch the big woman tie a penis on herself, a rosy thing, a caricature. And they take poses, nonchalantly, professionally...
Hugo and I look on, laughing a little at their sallies. We learn nothing new. It is unreal, until I ask for the lesbian poses.
The little woman loves it, loves it better than the man's approach. The big woman reveals to me a secret place in the woman's body, a source of a new joy, which I had sometimes sensed but never definitely -that small core at the opening of the woman's lips, just what the man passes by. There, the big woman works with the flicking of her tongue. The little woman closes her eyes, moans, and trembles in ecstasy. Hugo and I lean over them, taken by that moment of loveliness in the little woman, who offers to our eyes her conquered, quivering body. Hugo is in turmoil. I am no longer woman; I am man. I am touching the core of June's being.
I become aware of hugo's feelings and say, "Do you want the woman? Take her. I swear to you I won't mind, darling."
"I could come with anybody just now", he answers.
The little woman is lying still. Then they are up and joking and the moment passes. Do I want...? They unfasten my jacket; I say no. I don't want anything.
That moment alone stirred my blood with another desire. If we had been a little madder... But the room seemed dirty to us. We walked out. Dizzy. Joyous. Elated.
We went to dance at the Bal Nègre. One fear was over. Hugo was liberated. We had understood each other´s feeelings. Together. Arm in arm. A mutual generosity.
And when we returned home, he adored my body because it was lovelier than what he had seen and we sank into sensuality together with new realization. We are killing phantoms.
Anäis
Hugo and I look on, laughing a little at their sallies. We learn nothing new. It is unreal, until I ask for the lesbian poses.
The little woman loves it, loves it better than the man's approach. The big woman reveals to me a secret place in the woman's body, a source of a new joy, which I had sometimes sensed but never definitely -that small core at the opening of the woman's lips, just what the man passes by. There, the big woman works with the flicking of her tongue. The little woman closes her eyes, moans, and trembles in ecstasy. Hugo and I lean over them, taken by that moment of loveliness in the little woman, who offers to our eyes her conquered, quivering body. Hugo is in turmoil. I am no longer woman; I am man. I am touching the core of June's being.
I become aware of hugo's feelings and say, "Do you want the woman? Take her. I swear to you I won't mind, darling."
"I could come with anybody just now", he answers.
The little woman is lying still. Then they are up and joking and the moment passes. Do I want...? They unfasten my jacket; I say no. I don't want anything.
That moment alone stirred my blood with another desire. If we had been a little madder... But the room seemed dirty to us. We walked out. Dizzy. Joyous. Elated.
We went to dance at the Bal Nègre. One fear was over. Hugo was liberated. We had understood each other´s feeelings. Together. Arm in arm. A mutual generosity.
And when we returned home, he adored my body because it was lovelier than what he had seen and we sank into sensuality together with new realization. We are killing phantoms.
Anäis
